![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
last night i had a headache, so i read hardly any of the stuff i was supposed to read for class today. i got through the conclusion, though, and enough that i'll be able to make sense, no problem. i'm just about 55 pages short of where i should've been. and really, how much psychoanalytic theory can fit into 55 pages? :) i'm leaving class early anyway for Will Read for Food tonight--only like half an hour early (in a three-hour class), but whateva. i did get some other things done last night, like writing in all the captions in my vacation photo album from last summer (i do really good photo albums). i also listened to my new Sims mix cd--thanks, broseph! it was really fun. i only knew one song on it, too (the laidback piano music)--i'm guessing all the rest of it comes from expansion packs i don't have. and the singers cracked me up--it almost sounds like they're singing in an understandable language, but they're not, of course. it must have been really fun music to make, since the songs are just like real-world rap and rock and etc songs you'd hear on the radio, but the words are all total nonsense.
then i got up this morning, ate some cereal, took a shower. i decided spontaneously to shave my legs. it took forever, of course, because this is not exactly a regular occurrence. and *since* leg-shaving day is a pretty big event, i wanted the world to be able to appreciate my smoothness. ie, i wanted to wear a short skirt. i only have three short skirts in my closet right now (i think there might be one or two more packed away for summer)--one is a summery dress that is okay for fall, but it's a little chilly to wear it today. one is the black skirt with the slits all the way up the sides that sarah b gave me. one is pleather (totally not suitable for everyday wear). so it seemed to be the black skirt or nothing, but it looked awfully tight and sexy, which was okay for a night out but not really for a normal day with work and class and stuff. so as a backup, i tried the long black skirt and i tried the long denim skirt and i tried a variety of tops with each one but nothing looked right. then i decided to wear the short skirt anyway, but when i went to put on stockings, they all had holes or runs in them, and i put two new holes in the good control top stockings, so i gave up and just wore pants. they're my nice comfy soft black pants, at least, and i'm wearing the good black shoes. but i was still all disatisfied and uncomfortable when i left the house.
all of that getting-dressed took 45 minutes. i was up early, and i had wanted to use that time to run to the library and scan some pictures (tomorrow, i promise), but no, i spent that 45 minutes feeling icky about my body. i don't know what makes me like this, whether it's my head, my hormones (hooray menstruation), my hips, or the fact that i rarely get new clothes. probably some combination of the above. (for further evidence of my clothes paranoia, see here and here, particularly numbers 49, 62, 71-74). i wish i could just buy some new stuff, you know? i get all like, everything would be better if i just had (for example) some brown shoes, and then i get the brown shoes and the straps hurt my ankles and i can't wear them if i'm going to be walking a lot and i'm always walking a lot, and anyway they don't go with black things, and no problems are solved. also, i can't just *get* the thing when i want to get it, i have to think and ponder for months before i finally decide that YES I NEED THIS ITEM and then i go and try to find a good deal on it, and that takes forever too. and by then i'm glad to get whatever-it-is and i feel all triumphant, but by then there's a new Thing that i need that i can't get. so i'm never satisfied. now i want sexy tall black boots. and a brown sweater coat. and a nice black wool winter coat, but mom said she'd get me that for christmas. i also want more nice dress clothes, but that's more general. and i need new stockings. and i yell at poor jorn for having holes in his socks, i'm just as bad.
then i got up this morning, ate some cereal, took a shower. i decided spontaneously to shave my legs. it took forever, of course, because this is not exactly a regular occurrence. and *since* leg-shaving day is a pretty big event, i wanted the world to be able to appreciate my smoothness. ie, i wanted to wear a short skirt. i only have three short skirts in my closet right now (i think there might be one or two more packed away for summer)--one is a summery dress that is okay for fall, but it's a little chilly to wear it today. one is the black skirt with the slits all the way up the sides that sarah b gave me. one is pleather (totally not suitable for everyday wear). so it seemed to be the black skirt or nothing, but it looked awfully tight and sexy, which was okay for a night out but not really for a normal day with work and class and stuff. so as a backup, i tried the long black skirt and i tried the long denim skirt and i tried a variety of tops with each one but nothing looked right. then i decided to wear the short skirt anyway, but when i went to put on stockings, they all had holes or runs in them, and i put two new holes in the good control top stockings, so i gave up and just wore pants. they're my nice comfy soft black pants, at least, and i'm wearing the good black shoes. but i was still all disatisfied and uncomfortable when i left the house.
all of that getting-dressed took 45 minutes. i was up early, and i had wanted to use that time to run to the library and scan some pictures (tomorrow, i promise), but no, i spent that 45 minutes feeling icky about my body. i don't know what makes me like this, whether it's my head, my hormones (hooray menstruation), my hips, or the fact that i rarely get new clothes. probably some combination of the above. (for further evidence of my clothes paranoia, see here and here, particularly numbers 49, 62, 71-74). i wish i could just buy some new stuff, you know? i get all like, everything would be better if i just had (for example) some brown shoes, and then i get the brown shoes and the straps hurt my ankles and i can't wear them if i'm going to be walking a lot and i'm always walking a lot, and anyway they don't go with black things, and no problems are solved. also, i can't just *get* the thing when i want to get it, i have to think and ponder for months before i finally decide that YES I NEED THIS ITEM and then i go and try to find a good deal on it, and that takes forever too. and by then i'm glad to get whatever-it-is and i feel all triumphant, but by then there's a new Thing that i need that i can't get. so i'm never satisfied. now i want sexy tall black boots. and a brown sweater coat. and a nice black wool winter coat, but mom said she'd get me that for christmas. i also want more nice dress clothes, but that's more general. and i need new stockings. and i yell at poor jorn for having holes in his socks, i'm just as bad.
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
no subject